Stress is a physical, mental, or emotional factor that causes tension. Stresses can be from the environment, psychological, or social situation and illness.
A lot of different reactions occur in your mind and body when you experience stress. The stress hormones flood your body and cause physical reactions.
Children learn how to respond to stress as they grow and develop. Many stressful events that an adult can manage will cause stress in a child. As a result, even small changes can impact a child’s feelings of safety and security.
Not all stress is bad. There’s good stress, too.Yes, there is something known as eustress or “good stress.” Introducing the idea that stress can work to one’s advantage is a more powerful antidote to its ills. As parents, teachers, and care givers we want to take on the epidemic of childhood stress. We want to arm our children with tools to cope with challenges and increase well-being. So, let’s pause and recalibrate our approach. Instead of focusing on the negative effects of stress, let’s tell a more holistic story: not all stress is bad. Some stress can be their advantage. I propose we shift our goal from asking kids to stress less, to instead helping them stress better. Here are six ideas to do that.
1. Stop Highlighting the Negative Consequences of Stress
It’s our natural instinct to make children aware that they are hurting themselves. But focusing on the harm caused by stress has two drawbacks. First, it indicates to kids that stress is bad in an absolute sense, which is untrue. Second, combating stress using fear tactics can create even more stress. It stands to reason that thoughts like “Oh no, I’m stressed, and stress is so bad,” are going to make worse child’s worries. In other words, stress itself is stressful. And the research confirms this.
2. Introduce the Evolutionary Purpose of Stress
Kids of all ages love to know that stress has a purpose. Think about our ancestors who went out hunting and gathering food for their families.
In modern times, we don’t need to flee from predators, but the stress response still has a purpose. A certain amount of stress can help us marshal the resources necessary to reach a goal. Studies even prove that as stress increases, so too can performance.
3. Explore Two Different Types of Stress
There are two main types of stress: positive and negative. Positive stress even has a fancy scientific name: eustress. Most kids have experienced eustress. Ask them to think of a time when their heart was racing but there was no immediate threat or fear. It was while riding a roller coaster, watching a scary movie or going on a first date. That feeling is good stress!
Eustress can help boost motivation focus and energy. It create a feeling of excitement; and improve performance and decision making. It is generally short-term in nature. By contrast, negative stress, known as distress can cause anxiety or concern. It is often outside our coping capacities. It can decrease performance and lead to mental and physical problems. And may be short- or long-term in nature.
4. Dig into the Researched Benefits of Stress
Lend these ideas credibility by citing recent science. Here’s a snapshot of some studies related to the benefits of stress:
● Stress can help the immune system.
● Stress can improve memory and learning.
● Stress can improve decision-making.
5. Help Cultivate a Positive Stress Mindset
One of the simplest yet most powerful ways to stress better is to start with the right mindset.
6. Exemplify How Distress Can Lead to Growth
Sally Walker was a survivor of an airline crash that killed 83 people. She said, “When I got home, the sky was brighter, I paid attention to the texture of the sidewalks. It was like being in a movie… Now, everything is a gift.”
Let’s teach children that it’s important to embrace their emotions rather than run away from them. Children can highlighting where distress has led to positive change. These are reminders that something good — even great — can come from stressful times.